Dear Karl,

You are one smokin' hot, motherfucking sexy piece of ass and I would tap dat ass so hard they'd need the Jaws of Life to pry me off of you. Guuuuuuh. Stop being sex on legs for like, five seconds. Okay? FIVE SECONDS.

Owwww. You hurt my brain with your sexy manflesh. I hate you for being so hot you broke something.

Drooling,
me